Denise Kuchynka Selk, 42, passed away at the home she loved on Sunday, March 13, 2016.
Denise was born on October 16, 1973 at Holy Rosary Hospital in Miles City. She attended elementary, middle, and high school all in Miles City, and graduated a Cowgirl, with honors, as part of the CCDHS Class of 1991.
That very same night, destiny further aligned itself as Denise met the love of her life, Murrey Selk at an after-graduation celebration at the Yellowstone Tavern. Three days later they met again for their first date at a party scheduled at Woodruff Park. They’ve been mostly inseparable ever since. Later it was confessed that Murrey had been visiting his friend Mike’s house across the street from where Denise grew up for quite some time just to scope things out before his Yellowstone Tavern approach. Denise and Murrey eventually moved to Boise, Idaho where she attended school at Boise State University and acquired her love for Smurf Turf and Boise State Bronco athletics. They married on July 3, 1993.
The Selks decided to move back home to Miles City in 1994 to be closer to family and friends, while Denise began her professional career at First Interstate Bank. The couple grew into a family on June 14th, 1998, when their oldest daughter Kristen was born, the same day Michael Jordan won his last NBA Championship. Denise was a rabid Michael Jordan fan, and everyone wondered whether this new member of the family might end up named Jordan in living tribute. Luckily the name Kristen “Ten” is what stuck.
The family expanded further with Kristen’s two strapping younger brothers, Brandon Gary, on July 11th, 2001, and Ryan McKinley, born Nov 1st, 2006, while Denise’s career moved her through a successful time with Security Abstract & Title before she finally settled into her position as the financial manager of Quality Meats of Montana, a local family-owned business.
Denise had many interests, first of which was athletics. Denise was a varsity Tennis player in High School, and dabbled in other sports. Since her return home, she’s been a fixture at all of Miles City’s various sports venues, and has cheered all of Miles City on from her seat on the bleachers or in the grass, usually regardless of whether her own kids were in the lineup. Her positive voice of encouragement from the stands will leave a noticeable silence at Cowboy, Cowgirl, Little Guy, Maverick, Outlaw, Posse, MCYBA, and Miles City Softball events (among others) for years to come.
Denise also thoroughly enjoyed travel, whether to attend athletic events elsewhere, or just for leisure and experience. Denise had the opportunity to take Kristen to California on a mother-daughter trip to take in Eminem and Rihanna concerts, as well as Dodgers and Angels home games. She also recently accompanied Brandon on a mother-son campus trip to Boise to take in a couple BSU Basketball games. Ryan, the youngest (aka the self-styled Selky Smooth), always amazed his mom with his big words and topics of conversation years beyond his grade level.
Denise and Murrey took numerous trips on their own around the country as well, but most often to Las Vegas where she enjoyed many of her favorite experiences. She was well versed in Vegas’ Cirque du Soleil lineup, having attended each show at one point or another, all while enjoying her favorite restaurants such as PF Changs, Stripburger, and The Cheesecake Factory, among others. A relentless exerciser, her motto was that she tried to work out all the time just so she could eat whatever she wanted.
Denise had a serious competitive streak, probably the reason for her love of sports, but also the likely spark behind her enjoyment of online debate on Facebook and discussion forums like Milescity.com. It also drove her cutthroat drive to represent for the Girls’ team at big family volleyball matches or board game nights. With her own kids, her no-holds-barred approach often led to the kids ganging up on mom to even up the odds. Often that fire for victory led to an extra uncounted hop added to the dice roll or an “accidental” miscounting of Monopoly money, sometimes on either or both sides of the board.
Over the last few years Denise, driven by her love for kids, including the same Cowboys and Cowgirls she’d gotten so used to cheering for, took up various positions at the High School, eventually leading into her position as the school’s attendance officer, which she occupied until the time of her death. A few days before her passing, she commented proudly that she’d finally found “The Best job, where I can combine my love of kids with my love for dressing up.” Everyone who knew Denise knew exactly what she meant. Denise was always an advocate for the underdog, a fearless challenger of the status quo, and fierce defender of those she loved. A wonderful mother, sister, and daughter who considered all the kids of Miles City, and especially CCDHS students, an extension of her family, Denise has left a deep mark on all of us, and would likely encourage us to remember it as a reminder to “Be Kind” and approach life as fearlessly and encouragingly as she did.
She is preceded in death by her grandmother Evelyn Spengler and grandfather Hardin Spengler. She is survived by husband Murrey Selk, her children Kristen, Brandon, Ryan, her mother Ruth (Alan) Kuchynka, her brother Ricky (Tanneil) Kuchynka, her sister Stephanie (Brian Hubbell) Kuchynka and numerous other children in the community (especially those at the high school) who she considers family.
Visitation will begin on Sunday, March 20, 2016 with family receiving friends from 4:00-6:00 p.m. at Stevenson & Sons Funeral Home. Funeral Services will be held on Monday, March 21, 2016 at 3:00 p.m. at the Custer County High School Gymnasium. Interment will be held at a later date. Stevenson & Sons Funeral Home of Miles City is in charge of the arrangements. Condolences may be sent to the family by visiting: www.stevensonandsons.com.
In lieu of flowers, Denise would like it if you would make a donation to Erin’s Hope Project, the Miles City Food Bank or the Miles City Soup Kitchen in her honor.
Denise Selk, age 42, of Miles City
October 16, 1973 – March 13, 2016
Terri Newby says
I am so very sorry for your loss. I pray God will wrap his loving and comforting arms around all of you and ease your sorrow. You will remain in my prayers.
Scott & Heather Nelson says
We are so sorry for your loss. Denise was such a great person and so involved in the community. Our thoughts and prayers are with her entire family.
Deb (Moths) Schmeling says
I was saddened to hear about Denise. You are in my thought and prayers. May God wrap his comforting and loving arms around each one of you.
Mary Hurr says
Murray and kids, I am so sorry for your loss! Please know that you are all in our thoughts and prayers during this difficult time.
Beth Ann Wiedeman says
Our prayers are with you, may you find comfort in your memories and in God’s love.
Richard Bonine, Jr. says
I am extremely sorry and saddened for the loss of Denise. She was a marvelous, caring, compassionate person. I wish you peace and comfort in the days ahead.
Debbie and Tim Irion says
Words cannot express our sorrow for your loss. Denise always had a way of making my day a little brighter whenever I would see her. Please know that you are all in our thoughts and prayers.
Jeri Dalbec says
I am so sorry. Thoughts and prayers are with your family. Such a wonderful person. Such a loss.
Wendy Wilson says
Although I never met Denise in person, I enjoyed conversing with her on Facebook and Milescity.com. She was a very special person; her loss must be extremely painful for all who knew her. I wish her family as much comfort as possible in these circumstances.
Dana Stern says
The Selk family-
I am so sorry for your loss. My thoughts and prayers are with you all.
Dave and Mish Leidholt says
We are so sorry for your loss and pray time will heal your broken hearts. You all are in our thoughts and prayers.
donna smith says
so saddened by the death of your mom kirsten. our thoughts are with your family. life can change so fast, there are no words for so much sadness. with love from the smith family, jeremy and michelle, caleb, anthony, abigail, tom and donna smith.
Jason and Bonnie Higgins says
Bonnie and I are sorry for your loss. You are in our prayers.
Avis M.Rost says
I am very saddened by the death of this beautifully compassionate and caring person. My family sends their love and prayers to the family as you deal with something absolutely unexpected. She was always kind to me, and much to young for something like this to happen. God be with you all.
Pat and Cheryl Rogers says
We are saddened by the news of Denise’s death. Our thoughts and prayers are with you all during this most difficult time. May God comfort you.
Pat and Cheryl Rogers
Scott and Sue Jens says
Murray and children, we were so saddened by the news. Denise was a very loving and caring mother from all the sports news she so liked to fill the air waves with. She was a great student of mine, full of joy and life we will all miss her. She is in the care of her heavenly father now, and he shall take care of her now. May God bless and keep you all, you are in our prayers.
David Schott says
I am greatly saddened to hear of Denise’s passing. She was a tremendous person who had such a positive outlook on life, and she was so dedicated to her family and community. My condolences to the Selk and Kuchynka families. I am very sorry for your loss.
Jack, Karen, Christopher, Zach & Cooper Austin says
We are so sorry of your loss. Denise was such a positive force at all the kids’ events and she will be sadly missed. We’ll miss her smiling face at the games and at school. You’re all in our thoughts and prayers.
Jeana and Syra Brock says
What a loss for your family and for our community. It does not seem real. I will miss her smile and kind, thoughtful, and generous spirit. The love of her family was very evident and inspiring. I will strive to be a better mother because of Denise. You are all in my thoughts and prayers. Truly sorry for your loss.
Brent Kuchynka and Family says
We are extremely sadened to hear the loss of Denise. Our prayers go out to her entire family and Friends. God be with all of you.
Gene & Vickie Schneidt says
Dear Murrey, Kristen, Brandon and Ryan
We are deeply saddened to hear of the sudden death of your beautiful, compassionate shining light in Denise. Please accept our deepest and heartfelt condolences. While there is a great emptiness left by her passing, I am certain that the strength of love that you and your family share for each other and for Denise will get all of you through this difficult time. May that love honor her memory and may you cherish the time you had together.
“Though nothing can bring back the hour of splendor in the grass, of glory in the flower, we will grieve not; rather find strength in what remains behind. – William Wordsworth
gary and pat helm says
dear selk family, we are so sorry about denise may the goodlord give you strength to get by in this time of need. our prayers go out to you. love always. the helm family one and all
Denise Harvey says
We are all better people for having been blessed by our precious time with this amazing woman!! She will live on as we all remember to Be Kind!!!
Thank you for sharing her with us!
Denise Harvey
Emily Bennett says
Prayers with the family
John, Tricia, Ryan, Logan, Kaitlan and Ethan Warmbrod says
Selk and Kuchynka family
We are truly heart broken for all of you at the loss of Denise. Please know all of you are in our thoughts and prayers. We have many memories of Denise that we will keep dearly in our hearts. I pray you can find the strength within each other to help you get through this difficult time.
May time heal your sorrow
May friends ease your pain
May peace replace heartaches
And may warmest memories remain.
Cory Cutting says
I am stunned by this news. I have known Denise since she was rollerskating in Jr. high. She always had kind words and encouragement for me during rough times. I wish I could offer such great wisdom now. Murrey, May you and your family find peace in wonderful memories. My thoughts are with you.
Maureen Larson says
I am so very sorry for your loss. May you all find comfort in God’s loving arms and the memories that you all have. My thought and prayers are with you during this difficult time.
Ric and Sandy Rabe says
Selk Family, we are so sorry to hear of your loss. May God Bless You with comfort. Our prayers are with you.
Daniel newby says
Miss selk was an amazing lady and I might not have know her as well as some but we had sever great conversations and I’m really going to miss her have a great days. Family is in my prayers
Bonnie Boggs says
Murray and family. I cannot even believe this has happened. I am so sorry. Knowing her was a privilege that I will hold dear. Working with you kids and having you as my students showed me every day what great parents you have and how involved your Mom was with the importance of your education and in building your character. She was always available and I appreciated that so much. I wish I could make your sadness go away. I will hold you in my thoughts and prayers.
Ken, Kristi, Cara and Jennifer says
Dear Selk Family, our Prayers and Thoughts are with you all at this loss of your Loved One.
Just be assured that you have a whole village behind you to give you support and comfort as time passes. God Bless you.
Danielle and Steve Ray says
Murrey, Kristen, Brandon and Ryan,
Our hearts go out to all of you during this incomprehensible tragedy! Denise lives on in the beautiful children you have so wonderfully raised with her Murrey. I know your three incredible children will do great things and continue her legacy of love. She has touched so many lives and is one the kindest and most generous people I have ever known! Her beautiful friendship has been such a gift, and I cherish my many favorite memories of her and all the fun we had. Denise lives on in all the lives she has touched and forever in our hearts! We love you all and send big hugs your way!
Dennis & Susan Bakken says
Selk family. So very sorry for your loss.
Darbie Karch and Family says
Selk family: keeping your family in my thoughts and prayers. May God guide u through these difficult days.
Michelle Carda says
Denise was an amazing lady and I am so sorry for your loss!!
Jeff, Val, Ashlee & Kortnee says
Selk and Kuchynka Family,
Our family is keeping your family in our thoughts and prayers. Wishing you moments of peace and comfort.
With heartfelt sympathy,
Hyatt Family
Charlotte says
I’m so sorry to hear of your loss. It may at times seem unbearable, but something that has helped me cope, is this comforting thought in the Bible, found at (Revelation 21:4). It describes a time in the very near future when death, pain and sorrow will be gone forever. And God will restore His original purpose for the earth. We will even see our dear loved ones we have lost in death and hold them in our arms once again. When you are able, please consider these words at (John 5:28,29) ….Again, I hope these words bring a measure of comfort during this difficult time.
Jamie Ogolin says
Murrey, Kristen, Brandon and Ryan,
It is with very heavy hearts that we send our thoughts and prayers that God works with you all and those who surround you to comfort you during this most difficult time. When your family met ours and we began coaching together we learned so much about the games as well as how to treat people. Denise’s passion to include everyone, her passion to compete, and her perpetual smile will be missed greatly.
With sincere sympathy and love,
Jamie, Kristy, Tori Sue, and Alex Ogolin
Heather Wentz (Warner) says
I am so saddened to hear this news…Denise was so kind to me…and Robert…when we lived there. She is a beautiful person in so many ways.
JR & Carol Bean says
You have been holding all of you in our hearts this week. Denise was full of life and produced 3 beautiful children. Her spirit will live on through them. We are praying for time to ease the pain and to bring you comfort in her memory.
JR & Carol Bean says
We have been holding all of you in our hearts this week. Denise was full of life and produced 3 beautiful children. Her spirit will live on through them. We are praying for time to ease the pain and to bring you comfort in her memory.
Jim Brown says
Murrey and family, I can’t even imagine what you are going through, but wanted you to know I am thinking of you, and very sorry to hear that the woman you love so much is no longer physically with you. She will always be a part of you though.
Patty and Thomas Mott says
What an incomprehensible tragedy and loss. Our hearts go out to your entire family. God Bless.
Bryan & Jodi Peterson & family says
Murrey and children, we are so sorry to hear of your loss. Please know that you are all in our prayers and hope that you may find healing and comfort in God.
Shawn & Wendy Richards and family says
So very sorry for you loss. Thoughts and prayers for you all during this difficult time. Denise was a ray of sunshine and inspired many. She will be missed dearly.
Tory Fields says
Such a shock! Dear Family of Denise, please know we mourn this loss with you. Such a beautiful lady and touched many lives in her short years on this earth. Praying for peace and love for each of you at this very sad time. The legecy lives on in her lovely children she loved so dearly….God Bless you ALL with strength in knowing you will see her again in Heaven~let the precious memories sustain you!
Dale & Cindy Berg says
Selk and Kuchynka families,
So very sorry for your loss. Thoughts and prayers are will you all during this difficult time. Our hearts go out to all of you. God Bless.
Sherri, Rob, Derek & Braden Schneidt says
Thinking of all of you during this very difficult time. Heaven gained a beautiful angel with a huge smile and a heart of gold. Murrey, Kristen, Brandon & Ryan, we are here for you if you need anything. To you Miss Denise, you will truly be missed but I know in my heart you will be there will all of us cheering on our kids. Rest in Pease my Friend.
The Taylor Family says
Murrey, Kristin, Brandon and Ryan:
We want to express our sincere sympathy to all of you. Please know that you are in our thoughts and prayers. May you all find strength in one another to get through this most difficult time. Denise will be missed and has left behind wonderful memories for many to share. Peace and blessings to all of you.
Craig, Sherry, McKenzie and Amber
Julie Munsell Leischner says
Words can’t begin to express how saddened we are for the loss of your beautiful wife and mother. One could easily see how much Denise adored all of you. She clearly thought the world of her children, attending every sporting event possible, and cheering on not just her children, but the others as well. She was a ray of sunshine to everyone who saw her. That corner of the high school is a sad walk now. It just doesn’t make sense to walk in there and not see Denise. Our thoughts and prayers are with you all.
Beth (Petro) Brunk says
Murrey, kids and Kuchynka family:
My heart aches for your loss. What a wonderful person and beautiful family. My heart aches for you all. My thoughts and prayers go out to you all.
Beth and Brady Brunk, Amberli and Gus Oswald
Bill & Mary Wills says
We only knew Denise as a young girl that visited our home a couple times, with her parents and, siblings Stephanie and Ricky, when we lived in Seattle, also when we visited Miles City.. Then thanks to facebook we reconnected. We so enjoyed her posts. We are second cousins and feel so sad that a young beautiful person has left us so soon. We will truly miss her post on facebook. Sending love to the family.
Cherie says
May you be comforted by the love of God, your family and friends with this tragic loss of your beloved Denise. I am uplifting all of you in prayer and may peace be upon you in time.
Charlie Roos says
I am so very sorry to hear this Murrey.
Galen & Lauren Hafla says
Murrey and Kids, Godspeed to you all. I went to high school with Denise and she was wonderful. Reading the obituary brought a smile to my face in remembering, and wish your wife/mother were still here. Our sincerest condolences. Galen, Lauren, Gehrig
Chris and Jackson Reed says
Denise’s very bright smile and cheery voice will be missed greatly by so many of us. CCDHS is not the same at all without her. Murrey, Kristen, Brandon, and Ryan, we love you all and we miss you.
Noel Allison says
Very sorry for your loss.
Brenda and Larry Seagren says
We are so sorry for your loss Murray and family! Please know you are in our thoughts and prayers for the days ahead! God’s blessings of comfort and the gift of everlasting life for all who believe! It sustains us in these times! Love and prayers from the Seagrens!
Katie Seminole says
Sorry for your loss! Thoughts and Prayers to you and your families..
Grant and Megan Scott says
Murrey – our deepest sympathies for your loss. Know that you’re in our thoughts, memories and prayers. Lean on your friends and family. And may God comfort you and your family during this period.
Jackie O'Reilly Crowley says
Murrey and family ~
I was so shocked and saddened to hear about the loss of your beautiful wife and mom….there are just no words. Please know you have all been in my thoughts and prayers.
Sean Donnelly and family says
So sorry for your loss. As a new student who transferred to Washington Middle School for 8th grade in 1986-87, I remember Denise as one of those students who stood out from the crowd because of her charm, athleticism, and academic gifts, but especially as a very kind person at a time in life – our middle school years – when we weren’t all as kind as we should have been. I hope that you can all take comfort from your happy memories and from the knowledge that the prayers of so many are with you. God bless.
Peggy and Chuck Steadman says
Our thoughts and prayers are with you and your family Murrery!
Gwen Gamrath Gunther says
Someone used the term “gobsmacked” on Facebook, I don’t think any term could more accurately define the feeling when I learned of Denise’s passing. She was a classmate & friend. To whomever wrote her obituary, what a beautiful tribute! It is not easy to summarize a person’s life in a few paragraphs, especially someone as vibrant & dynamic as Denise. I hope that your families feel the love that is surrounding you by all that knew & enjoyed Denise for the person she was, we are so very sorry.
Doug & Kim Blunt says
Dear Selk and Kuchynka families,
Words of comfort seem hollow for such a sorrowful, unexpected loss. Our prayer is that you’ll find comfort in each other, and in the community of students and friends who also loved Denise for her kindness, humor and vitality. We wish you peace and rest.
Bob and Kathy Chapweske says
Ruthie and Family, We are so sorry for your loss. I didn’t know about it when I saw you today. I feel so bad. I can only imagine losing one of my daughters and I will have you in my prayers today and for many days to come. She is my youngest daughter’s age. If I can be of any help whatsoever, please let me know. If you just need a shoulder. I am here for you. Again, God bless you all and you will be in my prayers for a long time to come. HE is walking with you down this path and he will not leave you. Love you Ruthie Bob and I are with you.
Ray and Terri Schmidt says
We were so heartbroken to learn of the passing of Denise. She has impacted so many people in Miles City with her kindness and passion. She will be missed by so many. To all of Denise’s families–you have our love and our sympathy. I just wish I knew what to say to help take away some of the pain. I will always remember how totally excited she was when she saw the house come on the market that she and Murrey had dreamed of getting when they were first married and they could not wait to make an offer. It was one of the best sales I ever did – to have such totally happiness after dreaming about it for so many years.
Mary Pat Hartman-Harris says
To all the family, I’m still in shock reading the news and my heart goes out to all of you. Denise always had an amazing smile and spirit, and even though I haven’t lived back home for years, I will always remember her and her amazing will! My heart and prayers are with you.
Brian and Mary Kuchynka says
Our thoughts and prayers are with the friends and family during this difficult time.
Amber Gagnon & Family says
So sad to hear of Denise’s passing. Our thoughts are with her family & friends during this difficult time. Big hugs to Murrey & the kids.
Cinda Paynter, Noah and Nathan Christopherson says
Murrey and kids, our prayers are with you all. May you find peace and the wonderful memories fill your hearts and minds. God Bless.
Cinda Paynter
Noah and Nathan Christopherson
Merry and Armando DeAnda says
Dear Selk Family, We are so very sorry for your loss. Our Thoughts and Prayers are with you all during the loss of your Loved One. Our hearts go out to all of you during this difficult time. She has touched so many lives and is one the kindest and most generous people I have ever known. May God guide you through these difficult days.
Renée Peterson says
To Denise’s families,
My thoughts and prayers are with all of you at this time. May you find comfort in the Lord.
Renée Peterson
Connie (Ckarke) Genger says
To Denise’s family. So sorry for your loss of such a fine, lovely woman. Connie
Cody Turnquist says
To the Selk and Kuchynka Families,
I’m so sorry to hear about your loss. Though I haven’t seen Denise for a number of years, I remember that vibrant, competitive spirit she had way back when we were classmates. She clearly has made an impact on a lot of lives.
May the Lord provide you comfort in your sorrow. I pray that He will relieve your burden and give you peace.
God Bless,
Cody Turnquist
Jontee Ohanesian says
Murray and kids, I met Denise while photographing your lovely family, then Murrey and Kristin in Softball. Gabi and I were blessed to get to know you all during our time in MC. Denise was always a Ray of sunshine, alway happy. My prayers r with your family. God Bless.
Jontee, Sydney and Gabrielle
Jim and Karen Elliot and Kris Holmlund says
Our thoughts and prayers are being sent your way. we are so sorry for your loss. May God and his Angels comfort you all during this most difficult time.
Kim Combs says
To the Selk and Kuchynka Families,
I am so shocked and saddened to hear the news about Denise. May God provide you peace and comfort during these difficult times. And may her slogan ‘be kind’ live on forever.
Tonette Drane Dickhaut says
To The Selk and Kuchynka Families –
I am so sorry for the loss of your wife, mom, daughter, sister, aunt, cousin and friend. She was an amazing and inspirational person to all. She will be greatly missed. May you find comfort in all the wonderful memories you hold close to your heart.
God Bless, Tonette
Doug and Diane Ellingson says
Our thoughts and prayers are with you and family!